It isn’t easy making sure that each child feels the same love, affection, and appreciation. My first child was an only child for ten years. Then, BAM, I had three more within two years: a set of twins and the baby to follow two years later. I had no idea how much pressure I would feel to make sure that my youngest three felt the same love from Mommy as I had given their older brother for so many years. But the love comes naturally.
There is so much love to give to these kids, and it was unconditional the second I found out each time I was pregnant. But for ten years, I did not share this love. I gave it all to my baby boy. When I found out I was having twins, I felt scared that I would not have enough to share to make them all feel the same affection from me. Having two babies at the same time made me feel even more pressure. Would I hold them equally? Would they spend equal time getting read to and sung to by Mommy? What if I didn’t realize I was spending more time with one than the other? So many questions. My heart was filling up with love over the thought that I was having two more babies, but it was also breaking over the thought I might not be a good enough mom to make them feel loved equally.
As soon as I woke up from having an emergency C-section and waited for them to bring me to the babies in the NICU, the feelings of anxiety that I had been fearing melted completely away. The moment I saw each of them, it was like the Grinch. My heart grew, and I knew that I never needed to fear that my love would be equal. And what a silly thing to be concerned about anyway! I knew that I could share more than enough love, attention, affection, and kindness to all of my children. I would read and sing to them any chance I got, and it would be good enough because they were never going to keep a tally on me. My fears were completely gone, and I have never worried one day since those beautiful twin girls were born if I was going to distribute my love equally. When the baby came, my heart grew even more, and now there are four children inside of it, each getting not an equal part of love from Mommy, but the very perfect amount that each of them needs. Moms of multiple children need not ever worry if they have enough love to go around. We just do it naturally, and receive more rewards back than any mom could ever ask for.
Do you have multiple children? Share your experience in the comments below!